


The Price of Forget-Me-Nots

by Reiven



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Canon Divergent, F/M, pre-finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 12:50:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12507836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reiven/pseuds/Reiven
Summary: Eva was unsure of many things in life. Her own goals and ambitions, what she wanted to do with her life and where she was headed. Sometimes she’d look at the people around her and be envious of how certain they all seemed to be, how they appeared to know exactly what they were doing and what they wanted to achieve and who they wanted to be, while she always seemed to find herself getting caught up in the same situation with the same people and never quite managing to shake off the feeling like she was fated to always come in second to everyone else.But there was one thing she was absolutely not unsure of, and that was how beautiful Chris really was.





	The Price of Forget-Me-Nots

**Author's Note:**

> I have a couple of Chriseva fics on Tumblr that I never ended up posting ao3, so I'm slowly moving them here. This one was requested by a lovely anon:
> 
> _"Could you do a fan fic where Eva has just told Chris that she slept with Jonas last Thursday? Presumably before Sana’s party and the Chris/Eva situation. I’ve been playing the scenario over in my head and I would love to see how you would write it. Your fan fics are some of the best I’ve read._
> 
> I think I messed up the timeline a bit. I can’t remember how long it was between the birthday clip, the Penetrator Chris clip and the Eid clip, so this one takes place roughly sometime between the birthday and the Penetrator Chris clip when things started to become a bit more…serious, I’d say, between them.

Eva was unsure of many things in life. Her own goals and ambitions, what she wanted to do with her life and where she was headed. Sometimes she’d look at the people around her and be envious of how certain they all seemed to be, how they appeared to know exactly what they were doing and what they wanted to achieve and who they wanted to be, while she always seemed to find herself getting caught up in the same situation with the same people and never quite managing to shake off the feeling like she was fated to always come in second to everyone else.

But there was one thing she was absolutely not unsure of, and that was how beautiful Chris really was.

She’s looking at his sleeping face; his eyes closed and his lips slightly parted, inhaling and exhaling soft breaths. He’s on his side facing her and she’s facing his sleeping form and trying to keep from reaching over to gently caress his cheek with the back of her hand.

That wasn’t where their relationship was headed; if it could even be considered a relationship in the first place. They had fun occasionally and Chris was always good for a hook up or sex, plus he was nice to look at, which was always a bonus.

He was also one of the sweetest people Eva knew, who always listened to what she had to say with rapt attention and actual genuine interest. He always looked at her with a wide smile on his face and always seemed like he was truly happy to be in her presence and to have her around.

Maybe in a way, that’s what scared her the most.

Eva was used to not getting the attention she desired. She was used to always being put second and always being someone’s back up plan.

She wasn’t used to being the focus of someone’s attention and being a priority and having her company be something someone went out seeking just because they wanted to be with her and not just because they wanted something or they needed something or just because they happened to be free. 

She wasn’t used to someone dropping everything else to come see her just because she asked when she was usually the one dropping everything for someone else or being the something someone else would drop when something more important came up.

It was simple in the beginning; neither of them wanted anything from each other, it was all about the parties and the hooking up and the sex, it was simple. It was raw and it was dirty but it was what it was and it was what both of them needed.

But somehow it was just becoming more and more complicated and Eva really didn’t know what to think or what to make of it.

Chris had come to her party even though she’d only asked him once through an text and immediately handed him a free-pass if he was too busy, he was actually doing something with his life after all. She didn’t really expect him to come, and honestly it wouldn’t have hurt if he hadn’t anyway, after all, she was used to it.

But he did come and he came with William and Eva didn’t really know what to think about that.

She couldn’t stop playing the scene from the day before that over and over again in her head, finding herself at Jonas’s place, then one thing lead to another and somehow they’d ended up sleeping together and the whole time Eva couldn’t quite shake the feeling of guilt like she was doing something really wrong, and the nagging disappointment at herself that somehow she was right back at the starting point of her shitty life.

She and Chris weren’t together. She’d made that point clear to many people on multiple occasions, and yet there still was that feeling of guilt that gnawed at her the moment she saw his smiling face step out of the car and walking up the lawn towards her. She couldn’t stop thinking about Jonas’s face in bed and his shirtless torso and the things they did and how terrible she felt after. 

She couldn’t stop playing the scene over and over again in her head the whole day of the party; every time Chris turned to her with that smile on his face, the smile reserved only for her, and the awe she could hear in his voice when he told her how beautiful she looked.

Eva can’t stop thinking about what a big mistake she’d made, and looking at Chris’s beautiful, peaceful sleeping face beside her only made the guilt she felt on the inside grow stronger with each passing second.

“Take a picture. It’ll last longer.”

Eva was so lost in thought that it takes her a few seconds to realize that the words weren’t just in her head and that Chris’s peacefully sleeping form was now smirking at her even with his eyes still closed.

“Wha—how long have you been awake?” she asks, flabbergasted, smacking Chris on the shoulder causing him to laugh and finally open his eyes.

“Long enough,” he says. “You have been touching my chest very intimately for the past ten minutes or so.”

Eva glanced down to see that yes, her hand was indeed resting on Chris’s chest a little too comfortably, her thumb stroking the well-defined pec almost absentmindedly.

She immediately withdraws her had as if burned.

“You know, you don’t have to be shy and touching me in secret when I’m sleeping,” Chris says and Eva can only groan. “If you want a piece of this, you just have to ask, Eva. This body is here to service you.”

“God, shut up,” she groans, turning around so that her back is facing him. Half the reason was because she didn’t want him to see the blush slowly creeping onto her face.

“Hey, hey, I’m just kidding,” he laughs. Eva can feel him shifting behind her before his arm reaches over and pulls her into his chest in a firm embrace. “I’m just joking, Eva,” he says into her ear, he isn’t chuckling and his tone isn’t mocking and Eva is half inclined to believe him, but her heart is still reluctant to turn around to face him again. Mostly she still feels guilty about what she’d done. She had no reason to, after all they weren’t together, but in her heart she still couldn’t quell the feeling that she’d betrayed him somehow. “Eva? You okay?” She hears his voice again, asking her a question and she can feel her heartbeat stuttering inside her chest.

“Yeah,” she says, but she still can’t bring herself to face him. “Just thinking.”

“About what?”

She can feel him snuggling closer to her, his arm tight around her midsection and his face nuzzling the nape of her neck and in her hair. She finds herself subconsciously curling into herself, her arms reaching to hug herself tight and she hears the words leaving her mouth before she can give it any further thought. “I slept with Jonas,” she ends up blurting out.

Chris doesn’t immediately respond and Eva can only imagine the disappointment and the disgust that must be showing on his face. After all he was the first person who really knew about her problems with Jonas, that night during the party and what she’d told him in passing after that.

“Mhmm…okay?” The answer comes out more as a question than anything else which baffles Eva. She can almost hear the sound of the cogwheels in Chris’s brain turning from the tone of his voice alone. “Are you telling me or…” he trails off, and Eva’s about to turn around to look at him when he adds; “Asking to compare notes?”

“What?” Eva turns so quickly she almost gives herself whiplash.

“Should I sleep with Jonas too?” he reiterates and he has the stupid cheeky grin on his face that Eva usually finds endearing, only this time she feels like she’d much prefer knocking it off his stupid face.

“What?—No! I mean—Like…what?”

But then Chris is laughing; he rolls onto his back and clutches his stomach as his laugh becomes more boisterous and carefree in a way that Eva has never seen before. Soon she can feel the furrow of her brows becoming less severe and the frown on her face easing into a hesitant smile at the way he’s laughing so joyously.

“You’re such an idiot, Chris,” she says, but she’s flopped back down onto the bed and burrowed her face into the crease of her pillow.

It takes about a minute or so before Chris’s laughter finally subsides, leaving him gasping for air and reaching up to wipe the tears trickling out the corner of his eyes. A few extra chuckles escape him before he finally turns back to face Eva, his body turning right along with his attention and his arm reaching over to grasp her by the shoulder, pulling her close.

“Sorry,” he says, “But you were just so serious, it was funny.”

Eva exhales once and turns to face him with half her face still burrowed in the pillowcase. “It wasn’t funny to me,” she says, and Chris seems to sober up immediately.

“No, it wasn’t,” he says, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have laughed but…was that what was bothering you the whole time?” Eva doesn’t answer, but her silence is all the answer Chris needed. “You know I don’t care—I mean, unless you want me to care. I can be more upset about if you want,” he adds, dropping his tone a couple of octaves before he says; “Eva, how could you betray my trust like that? I am beyond disap—”

“Shut up,” Eva says, smacking him hard on the chest but he’s grinning and soon so is she.

They settle into a peaceful calm after that. Eva nestles into her pillow, her long hair splayed messily around her head and Chris readjusts the blanket around his lower half.

“When?” Chris asks suddenly, and it takes Eva a moment to realize which ‘when’ he was referring to.

“Last Thursday,” she says in a small voice, looking down at her finger trailing invisible doodles on the mattress between them; looking anywhere except at Chris gazing intently at her. “I went to invite him to the party and we…kind of reminisced—and one thing led to another. I didn’t know you were coming—or rather, I wasn’t sure if this was still a thing and that we’d end up spending the week together and—and I guess…I didn’t know what I was expecting.”

Chris looks thoughtful, which Eva finds encouraging. He didn’t seem overly reactive in one way or another which was a good sign. Maybe.

“I don’t know what you see in the guy,” he says after a while. “He doesn’t deserve you.”

Eva finally glances up to meet his gaze . “And you do?” she asks jokingly.

Chris looks absolutely serious when he says, “I hope so...one day,” and Eva is left absolutely speechless.

Eva has to think before she speaks again. “Jonas is…I mean, Jonas was…umm—Jonas was a vision, the culmination of a dream I once had,” she says.

“And he’s not anymore?”

“I still have the dream, but it’s not the same vision or the same person,” she says.

“And who do you see in your vision now?” Chris asks.

Eva is silent for a moment. “I don’t know,” she says, and it’s the truth. “There is someone there, but his face is blurry like—maybe because there isn’t a face to fill in that space yet.”

Chris is gazing at her with almost unnerving intensity. “That’s fascinating,” he says, with a bit too much emphasis on the word fascinating in a way only genuinely Chris.

“Haha,” Eva says, trying to be nonchalant about it but hoping the blush creeping across her cheeks isn’t too noticeable.

“No, I’m serious. I’m really intrigued. I never thought about it that way before,” he says, and there’s a sincerity in his voice that couldn’t be faked and Eva dares to glance back at his face. He’s smiling and there isn’t a hint of ridicule in his expression.

“Really?” she finds herself asking in the small voice she hated but always subconsciously ended up doing. “You don’t think it’s stupid?”

“Not at all,” he says sternly. “I told you, Eva. I like brainy girls,” he adds. “Plus you’re easy on the eyes, so that helps too.”

He laughs when Eva starts smacking him playfully on the arm. When he manages to swat all her hits away, she resorts to a tickle attack on his exposed sides. They’re both laughing at this point and Chris ends up flat on his back gasping for air from the combination of the laughing and trying to defend against Eva’s merciless onslaught. Eva is half lying on top of him, her head resting on his chest and her arm slung across his torso.

“Feel better?” He asks after a while and Eva can’t do anything more than nod with a soft affirmative hum that only Chris can hear.

“That never would have happened by the way,” she says after a beat. When Chris mimics her response with a questioning hum, and she can feel him shift slightly to look down at her. She doesn’t meet his eyes when she says. “With Jonas…Isak pined after him for years and he never even noticed. I doubt you could have gotten even one third of the way with him.”

And Chris is howling with laughter again. This time Eva joins him, her heart feeling so much lighter than it has been in weeks. There were still so many things to figure out and settle, but to Eva, at least she got one thing out of the way.

A few days later Chris comes by with flowers and Eva is once again left absolutely speechless. She can’t find any words to answer his question when he asks what she wants to do, but managed to shoot down his suggestion of spending the evening watching the Fresh Prince. She liked the show well enough, but she liked it mostly because Jonas liked it. There were so many other things she would have preferred watching instead, but she never cared to mention it to him. Having Chris asking her what she wanted to do, that was almost putting her on the spot in a way.

They spend the rest of the night cuddling in bed and she asks to him Sana’s Eid party on Friday and even though she had been looking forward to the party since the moment Sana invited them, at this point though, perhaps she was that much more excited to go.

She honestly couldn’t wait for Friday.

**THE END**

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on tumblr @[reivenesque](http://reivenesque.tumblr.com/).


End file.
